No Kidding: What We Talk About When We Talk About Not Having Kids | Bitch Media

I love this series. Brittany Shoot, previously interviewed by podcast, The Story, on her choice to undergo tubal ligation surgery at 27, is now over at Bitchmagazine.org blogging about women’s decisions to have children or not. She discusses why women may decide to not have children. She talks about the fallout amongst family and friends, as well as the celebrations. She questions society’s all too willing judgments against childfree people, including celebrities. She talks about the fascination with extremely large families and the equally odd lack of interest in tiny ones. I can’t wait to see what she blogs about next.

Below is the first in her series, No Kidding; I plan to feature each of her posts here at the Scarlet Tartlet because I think it’s such a compelling topic that deserves widespread and civilized consideration. And because I, myself, am not personally interested in childbearing. (Undecided about adoption as of yet.)

No Kidding: What We Talk About When We Talk About Not Having Kids | Bitch Media.

What about you? Ever experience any uncomfortableness around the subject of having kids or not having kids? Experienced any family or peer pressure?

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5 thoughts on “No Kidding: What We Talk About When We Talk About Not Having Kids | Bitch Media

  1. Luckily, as lesbians, my partner and I don’t feel as much societal pressure to breed. Neither of us want to and we enjoy our lives with our pets and other childfree friends. Since our friends are mostly gay, they don’t care much for children either. Nobody expects a bunch of dykes to procreate, and I’m glad I don’t have to answer the question that often.
    People assume we don’t want kids so when they ask casually and we say “no thank you”, they leave it alone. Some probably breathe a sigh of relief.

    Now…if only they can work on a childfree community in my city! One whole block without kids or near any annoying schools.

  2. Pingback: No Kidding: Jennifer Aniston, We Hardly Know You | Bitch Media « the Scarlet Tartlet

  3. Thanks, childfreefeminist, for your comments! I’m glad you enjoyed the post. A lot of gay and lesbian couples do want to have kids, of course, and are able to through surrogates, insemination, or adoption. Just like anyone, though, it should NEVER be assumed. We’d all be a lot happier and less bitter if everyone just minded their own business and celebrated events with us *if* they occur, rather than conducting interrogations on *when* they are to be expected.

  4. YES, some queers want kids and the assumption that we don’t or *shouldn’t* is hurtful and offensive. We’re told we’re self if we DO want to have kids. The message is basically this: if you are not furthering the heterosexist family agenda, you are selfish at best– and probably sick and dangerous, too.

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